Tuesday, June 26, 2012


To write something, whether an article, a poem, or a song, is not as easy as it seems. To voice out your opinions, we have to reread back what we have wrote so that it doesn't seems too 'stupid' or childish. More, the important things are at how we write our words, how formal or 'mixed' they are.

Our writings are actually a 'window' to our inner self. A wrong step may lead others so see inside us what we hope others don't know. They are the 'voice' inside us that we always talked with all the time, which is actually our own self, so most of the time only when we wrote back what the voice said to us, we can really 'see' what have been lingering in our mind all these time clearly.

If I am to regret with my school days, one of them is to underestimate the function of languages. Honestly, I really didn't see back then the point of 'how' to score in languages subjects, and its use in real life later. I mean, if maths or sciences they are about knowing the facts right and able to use them back in our exam papers. Then we might use all the facts and knowledge to invent something new. But English and Malays? All I saw was only the grammars, which I thought are quite annoying. I never get to see inside me how mastering them can really be any use, except to talk to each other, which I had in my mind, "Well at least we can talk right? What else do the teachers want?" lol.

Seriously, I have to apologise to my languages teachers for sleeping in their classes all the time. God knows how much they always err, annoyed with me. Sorry teachers, I was a fool.

I don't know whose writing is that, do I? haha
That was not until I finally had to 'use the language' in real life, such as to give a speech. Only then I realised how awful I was in finding the right word at the right time. I was trembling, stutter in my speaking and anxious that I don't know what I was saying. The next thing I remember I already finished my words and on my the way back to my seat. The words have to be properly arranged whenever I want to send a formal letter so that we can get what we requested.

Then, I had to learn how to 'speak correctly' so that others will get what I mean to say and understand my message. Misunderstanding is one of the major reason that cause a plan to fail or didn't happened as it should. Worse, it will lead to fighting and any organisation to crumble. Most people know how to speak, but nowadays not everyone can really 'communicate', thanks to the technology that have been occupying new generations 'communicating' with robots and computers only. They missed the important lesson of social skills.

Words can also be used to raise others passion or to calm down when one is down. The right words can touch one heart and change someone. Only now I finally get to see the beautiful and artistic behind languages. Sigh.

Eh wait, I wrote to much. What I really mean to say is that, writing is not as easy it seems. I have ideas in me, but when I try to write them, they always didn't went as I wanted to. I mean, I always get stuck in vocabulary, and arranging my sentences, not to mention with terrible grammar. Lots of time, they end up sound so 'stupid' that I get stressed, I closed the tab helplessly. You don't want to know how many drafts I have in here. Haha.

However, I think I am getting a hang on it. Since I was aware the importance of languages, I have been reading books to improve myself, in vocabulary and ideas. Please do bear with me in my slow posts.

Oh yeah, one more thing. In conclusion, I really think writing is really good for everyone. At first, we may sound really stupid, ashamed with what we wrote, but if we are to learn slowly, we will able to write nicely and soundly acceptable to most of people. To leave a writing can actually be important, especially if what we wrote can somehow 'change' others, directly or indirectly. If we are to die, at least our writings, the good ones, can stay and be read by others. We might have chance to gain rewards even after we die, God Willing.

That's all for today, assalamualaikum~


Saturday, June 23, 2012

Nothing particular in this one.

Ehem. Assalamualaikum. =)

How are you? Missing me already? lol, just kidding. I doubt it anyway, because nevertheless my absentee in here, I am quite active in my facebook and twitter. Plus, is there really a loyal reader out there? erk, haha.

However, please forgive me for the no-post last month. I've been occupied with the end of the year exam studies and preparations. If any of you reader notice, I tried to do at least one post a month, and seems I just failed myself on that target. Haihh, my apology. I know that to reward any loyal reader of this blog, I should be diligent in updating it.

Right now, I already back to my beloved country, Malaysia. =D

To think about it, nearly a year have past since I furthered my study overseas to University of Sheffield. Even as I am writing this, a part inside of me still have the feeling 'excited' and 'not believing' that I already there. Honestly, when I was small, I thought it just a very vague dream that look like impossible for me to achieve it. I remember clearly in my mind, I had this dream since I saw my eldest sister went to Cork, Ireland to do her medic. I was only in my lower form grade, and I wasn't a really bright student either. Instead, I am one of the hardworking people out there.

Why am I saying that? Because if you are to check my examination records, I am not of the top students in the monthly or annually exam every year in my schools. Instead, they were always up and down, which show the time when I get studious, and not.

All and all, I still recall clearly in me that I have been asking to Him to allow me to study to England since I had that ambition (the moment I had a sister who went there), despite my 'incapability' or the not-promising records back then. I believe if I am to able to go to England, it all depends on Him. When He wills a thing, is only to say to it: Be! and it is! (Kun Fayakun). Hence, I don't think I deserve to be proud of myself. It is not because I am smart or what, instead all my happiness and gratefulness should be given to Him, the All Powerful and The Best Planner. Alhamdulillah~

Enough of my rambling, I have a few ideas and things in my mind that I have wanted to write, but seems doesn't come out here properly. I will try to write them here later, insyaAllah.

Please pray for me for my exam result, and I get to write the ideas here smoothly. Farewell, until we meet again.


During the exam preparation, proof I really was studying last month lol.
Location: Information Common, University of Sheffield's biggest library, a 6 stories building.